Long live rock, I need it every night

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Flotsam & Jetsam

Okay, I missed the Eagles of Death Metal/Duke Spirit show last night. My son's been barfing regularly since Sunday morning and he hurled just as I was about to leave last night so I couldn't leave my wife high and dry. The good news is that I seem to have happened upon some sort of perpetual motion machine because he seems to be puking up more food than he's taking in. If I can somehow harness this power I can make money/solve the world's problems. Typically, Sacklunch tells me last night's show was "f*cking awesome." He said he'd get a review up sometime.

There was a post on the Miami Sun-Sentinel's blog about shitty NFL rap videos that Stereogum linked to. This is right in my wheelhouse. As a devoted Raider fan (I've found that saying that out loud these days is like going to Gymboree and announcing "I am a devoted pedophile") I always felt "Silver and Black Attack" was the best NFL rap video of all time. The Sun-Sentinel's list is comprehensive so I won't say much more about it, but they did miss two key entries.

First, here's Jonathan Ogden (Baltimore Ravens tackle and DC native) in an insurance commercial. Technically not a team rap video, but funny nonetheless (30 seconds):

And here's the big oversight--ladies and gentlemen, I give you, yourrrrrr Glasgow Diamonds!

The Glasgow Diamonds were not part of NFL Europe. They were just a bunch of Scottish dudes who played American football and made a video. Not bad, considering. The best part of the video is the relentless dreariness that is the UK. It always looks like it's 10 minutes to sunset there and all colors are a variation of brown.


I forgot about these two vids. While we're on the international tip, here's "Ossie's Dream" by Tottenham Hotspur, to get everyone fired up for their FA Cup run in 1981. This one's not particularly funny and it's really sort of catchy, but at 1:58 Argentine midfielder Ossie Ardiles chips in with some fractured English. Watch it, it's a hoot.

And here's the New England Patriots' "New England, the Patriots and We." This is from 1986--their devastating riposte to Chicago's "Superbowl Shuffle" from the same year. Chicago had the better musical chops and bitchified the Pats on the field, 46-10.


Jumbo Slice said...

Sorry to hear Jr. isn't feeling well. Have you been puked on? Last night while shopping, runny yellow poop leaked out of my daughters diaper and down my shirt, jeans, and on to my shoe. Of course, I walked around the store for a while before I noticed. Then I realized why people were giving me such disgusting looks.

Jimbromski said...

Yeah, he's gotten me a few times. He had a high-volume incident (HVI) yesterday right after I finished giving him sweet potatoes, all over his high chair. The dog was pretty helpful and ate most of it. Christine yelled at me because I didn't clean the high chair very well (I wiped it with paper towels and let the dog handle the rest) and consequently the chair smelled pretty bad. Look, I'm doing the best I can here.

between him and the dog I feel like I spend a lot of my time handling poo, pee, and puke. I should be featured on "Dirty Jobs".

Jumbo Slice said...

Jesus, I didn't think I could hate the Patriots more until I saw that last video. That's worse than spying on the other teams. They deserve some sort of punishment. Dock them another draft pick.

Jimbromski said...

Yeah, I just watched it again, it's horrible.

The Bills must have put together something like this, all those times they were in the Super Bowl. I can't imagine how sad that video(s) must be.

"Well, my name's Thurman Thomas and I'm here to say / make sure you remember where you put your helmet"

etc etc, refrain

Potsy said...

you should take these stories on the road to high schools. sort of a "scared straight" series. most effective birth control campaign i've ever heard.