DC ROCK CLUB
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Sunday, November 25, 2007

Covers pt II

Thought of a few more covers I liked whilst munching on my bacon this morning (Oscar Mayer maple-flavored, it's excellent and conducive to deep thinking).

According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the most-covered bands/artists are (1) The Beatles, (2) Bob Dylan, (3) Motorhead, (4) The Kinks, and (5) Crazy Town. The four covers below are of The Kinks.

"Victoria," The Fall

The original may have been slightly tongue-in-cheek but you got the sense that Ray Davies really did look back fondly on the 19th century. Mark E. Smith was just being sarcastic here.

"Days," Kirsty MacColl

As Wallace said to Grommit, "well, I thought that was quite nice." MacColl was killed while swimming off the coast of Mexico when she was hit by a speedboat. No word on whether Gloria Estefan was driving the boat.

"David Watts," The Jam

More up-tempo with an Oi! feel than the original. One of the Jam songs sung by bassist Bruce Foxton, rather than Paul Weller.

"You Really Got Me," Van Halen

Re-invented for the coked-up 1980s (well, 1978, anyway). Lots of pelvic thrusting and jumping around.

On a side note, does anyone else think David Lee Roth is gay? This has been an ongoing debate in Rock Club for over a year.

Some arguments against DLR's homosexuality:
1--banged all those chicks
2--cursed a lot
3--sang a lot of songs about banging all those chicks
4--America couldn't handle it if he did turn out to be gay
5--shows no signs of full-blown Henry IV

Arguments for DLR's homosexuality:
1--flamboyant dress sense
2--wears tight pantaloons/dungarees
3--love of show tunes/Broadway ("Just A Gigolo"--hmmm? Hmmm?); also does that scatting thing all the time ("bop bud zee budzee bop, titti-bop, titti-bop"...although in this example the phonetic sound for "titty" is used twice, so who knows)
4--called in as special consultant for Saturday Night Live "Schmitz Gay" commercial
5--emphasizes crotch-thrust move when dancing

My verdict:
Roth is pansexual, meaning he'll put his dick into any available orifice--a tree knot, Star Jones, Mammoth Cave KY, etc.--in order to get a nut. Other notable pansexuals include David Bowie, Mick Jagger, Abraham Lincoln and Sack Lunch's mom.

Case Closed: Pansexual

6 comments:

Chip Chanko said...

That David Watts cover is great...makes all mod cons my favorite jam album (besides it being a great album). One of my favorite covers in the last few years is Futureheads doing "Hounds of Love."

Jimbromski said...

Wow, how could I forget about the Futureheads? That should be its own category--covers that are better than the original.

Also, quit dodging the hard questions, we need you to weigh in on the David Lee Roth gay/not gay/sort of gay debate.

Jumbo Slice said...

You can't be serious about Motorhead. Danzig, maybe. Every band should do a cover of "Mother".

Should I (or my wife) be worried that 4 of the 5 homosexuality arguments for DLR also apply to me?

Jumbo Slice said...

I forgot to cast my vote. I think he's straight but you make a solid case for pansexual...

I say straight. He has pansexual tendencies but he's no Bowie or Jagger. Seriously, have you see the Dancing in the Street video? Watch how they dance around and sing in each others face. DLR can't compete w/ that.

Potsy said...

I think you all know that I'm on a campaign to out DLR. I just want him to be happy, really. I don't care that he is gay or not gay. But he's gay, so why can't he just let us celebrate him?

And what's with all these damn music files on this post, Jimbromski? They'ver screwing up the blog. Takes foreeeeeeeeeever for this page to load. Please try to restrain yourself.

Jimbromski said...

BTW I was not serious when I listed Motorhead as the third most covered band in history.

Nor is Crazy Town the fifth most covered. Altho "Butterfly" is awesome.

Come my lady, come come my lady

I love allmusic but this bio of Crazy Town is...hmmm...a little too much attention for such a shit band?

http://wc06.allmusic.com/cg/amg.dll?p=amg&token=ADFEAEE47F1ADD4CA47520CE933241DA8B75FB07CA46F6AE162F5E58DDBC3D068E027BFD4FF48789E8AB22EB35AEFE31A65210D1CAEE51B0DD6637388CE4A264284F36&sql=11:anfuxqwjldte~T1