DC ROCK CLUB
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Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Homosexualized

The Homosexuals (w Fiasco)
Comet Ping Pong
March 14, 2009

Blast From The Past is an underrated movie. Christopher Walken stars as a brainiac weapons scientist in California in 1962. He builds a kick-ass fallout shelter and one day, during the Cuban Missile Crisis, mistakes a nearby jet fighter crash for a Soviet nuclear attack. He hustles pregnant wife Sissy Spacek into the shelter, which has a 35-year timelock. Fast forward to 1997--shelter door unlocks, and Walken sends now-grown son Brendan Fraser out into the world. Hilarity and Alicia Silverstone romancin' ensue.

Saturday's Homosexuals show at Comet felt like that. The Homosexuals were a bottle rocket of a band that formed in the Spirit of '77 in the UK and by 1984 had succumbed to the Spirit of Kajagoogoo and called it quits. But unlike many other Homosexuals from the 1980s, the band refused to die of AIDS (sorry) as frontman Bruno Wizard reformed the group a few years ago, with some session-type dudes replacing the original bass, guitar and drummer. Sack and I plus our pal Mark arrived at Comet on Saturday knowing nothing about the band, except that they're a Malitz fave, so I was a little surprised to see this old California Raisin guy step up to the microphone after Fiasco (more on them below) finished up. But you know what? I learned a nice lesson this night--old people are not as fucking useless and annoying as I thought, and we should not harvest them in order to make Soylent Green. Wizard and co. were excellent. The man has stage presence and put some intensity into each number. It seemed like he personally made eye contact with everyone as he sang, which was nice. It works for job interviews and it also works for rock shows. The only drawbacks were the banter--not too shabby but when you've heard the best (Pelle Almqvist) you don't have patience for second rate. I could be wrong but I think Wizard denounced Ronald Reagan twice, on separate rants. He never should have fired those air traffic controllers, man.

Standout tracks were "Hearts in Exile," which is a neat little song, and "Neutron Lover." You hear songs like these and think, why didn't this band hit it big back in the day? And then you think, ah yes, the band name. Anyway, here's two vids of the band. First is "Hearts in Exile"--the song doesn't start until 3:11, as Bruno spends the first three minutes explaining geopolitics to the audience (fuck). Second vid is "Neutron Lover"--also excellent, but the banter in this one was recycled at Comet to the same leaden effect.





Some words on Fiasco--this threesome were pretty heavy and played predominantly instrumental-type music along the lines of locals Imperial China. Their drummer was intense and looked like Ginger Baker, which is a fantastic look for a drummer, of course. Potsy has a franchise idea for Presidential Pancakes, where you serve pancakes shaped in the silhouette of former US presidents. We were thinking of something similar with rock stars, but the only thing we could think of was a 13-chocolate-chip-cookie special: "Ginger Baker's Dozen." Stupid.

Another notable Fiasco fact: the lead guitarist would do two-handed hammer-on Eddie Van Halen-type solos, which rule. Alas, there were again too many Primus-type abrupt tempo changes and slap bass noise going on. Is this fucking jazz? No. Snippets of songs would begin to sound cool (i.e., melodic), but it was if they had a radar that would alert them to spazz out into another direction whenever that happened. Still, not a bad band by any means.

Final thoughts: first time to Comet to see a band (been there for pizza before, though). Crowd was a mix of underage Wilson HS types, the same sort you see at Ft Reno in the summer, with old schlubs like us sprinkled throughout. Good crowd but not crowded, you dig me? Sound was good as well, beer was easily accessed....A++++would use again, and definitely one of the stronger shows I've been to lately. Also we played some ping-pong out front. Here's some video of me destroying Sacklunch and then celebrating my win with a sexually-charged victory dance:



PS--Yarrrgggh! Forgot to add one important detail to this review. You know who we saw leaving the venue after The Homos finished up? That's right, Ahmed the Blind Guy. This guy deserves a Lifetime Achievement Award.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

I totally agree on Reagan firing those air traffic controllers--damn Taft-Hartley Act of 1947!

Jimbromski said...

Viva PATCO

Potsy said...

Can we keep Presidential Pancakes ® on the down low, please? I'm in the silent phase of my fundraising campaign.

AIDS jokes might be what this city needs to get people's attention. 3% HIV infection rate in the Nation's Capital...I blame Marion Barry.

Jimbromski said...

You need to accept that Presidential Pancakes is a pipedream that will never come to fruition.

I challenge you to distinguish the profiles of all the D-list early 19th century presidents--the Van Burens, Harrisons, your John Tylers, Zachary Taylors, Fillmore. Can't be done unless you add eyeballs with chocolate chips/blueberries, and maybe use whipped cream for shading or beards. I just don't see it working.

Potsy said...

You don't use those particular old dead dudes. You use the iconic ones, those whose mere profile distinguishes them from one another. Now that we have a Black president, we have the chocolate pancake...see...now you've got me giving away the whole strategy.

I might not actually see the restaurant come to fruition, but I will at least use the idea as a backdrop in my next sitcom treatment. Kinda like Arnold's in Happy Days, or the Peach Pit in BH:90210.

Jimbromski said...

the Taft pancake could be four separate pancakes stitched together with licorice, maybe

because he was enormous, you know

Anonymous said...

First, just want to say that you kids have been turning out really good content of late. Unbiased opinion: I'd say this even if Potsy were not involved in this space.

I'm totally going to take that pancake idea and merge it with my cereal restaurant plans.

Valerie said...

That blind guy's name is Ahmad, not Ahmed. If you're going to comment about him in your posts regularly, you could at least spell his name right.

Jimbromski said...

Actually, the least I could do is not mention him at all. However, duly noted and henceforth I shall spell his name correctly.

Jumbo Slice said...

Valerie - Do you know if Ahmad won the 9:30 Club raffle/contest for tickets to all their 2009 shows? You won last year, right? When I was in DC in December he was telling about it. I had no idea they had that contest each year.

Jimbromski said...

It's actually spelled سيرة د.محمد ميلود خرصي, make sure you get it right next time

Valerie said...

I did win it last year. I told Ahmad about the raffle. You'd have to ask him yourself if he won. I'm sure you'll see him at a show sometime soon ;)

Jimbromski said...

We actually just saw him at King Khan last week...the man is a constant in our variable world