Long live rock, I need it every night

Friday, May 11, 2007

Big In Japan

As we bide our time until the LCD Soundsystem show on Sunday, I thought I'd post some filler, something to entertain our vast audience.

As many of you know, I've long been fascinated with the possibility of creating a chimp/human hybrid, a "humanzee", if you will. The day is fast approaching where science can make this happen. In the year 2020, all children will have a humanzee companion, who will fend off sexual predators, and drive them (the children, not the pedophiles) to soccer practice.

Anyway, here's the story of Oliver, considered the world's first humanzee. Also, dig this, from Wikipedia:

One [humanzee] claim was that a common chimpanzee was impregnated by human sperm in a laboratory in China, but was killed by a mob before giving birth during the Chinese Cultural Revolution in the 1960s. A similar story, reported by University at Albany psychologist Gordon Gallup, alleged that a human-chimp hybrid was successfully engendered and born at the old Yerkes National Primate Research Center in Orange Park, Florida in the 1920s, but was destroyed by the scientists soon after.

Leave it to the Chinese Communists to spoil a good thing. Here is some Oliver footage:

Okay, how is this rock-related, you ask? Answer: (1) Oliver was/is "Big In Japan" and sources say he inspired the Alphaville song of the same title, and (2) "Humanzee" would be an excellent name for a rock group, or maybe just an album.

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