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Tuesday, December 11, 2007

The Dirt, excerpt 7

(In honor of National Drugged and Drunk Driving Month, Rock Club will be running random excerpts of the Motley Crue autobiography The Dirt. Read more on our community-oriented campaign here.)

In this excerpt, Tommy Lee describes his wedding day, and Heather Locklear's vertebrae C1 through C7:


When the tour ended, we married in a courtyard in Santa Barbara. I wore a white leather tuxedo and she wore a white strapless dress with white sleeves that started midway down her arm, leaving her tan shoulders and thin delicate neckbone uncovered...Rudy, one of techs, gave us the best toast ever: "To Tommy and Heather," he said, raising a champagne glass. "May all your ups and downs be in bed." Then he took the champagne glass and smashed it over his head.

...the only problem that afternoon was Nikki. I asked him to be my best man, and he showed up a mess. He was emaciated; he sweated constantly; and his skin was pure yellow, dude...as a best man, he was so fucked up on heroin he was useless. I couldn't believe he was shooting up at my fucking wedding.

(Tommy Lee, pp 162-163)

7 comments:

jcr said...

This is EXACTLY why Super Zoe and I have decided not to have any attendants at our wedding. Just too risky.

Super Zoe said...

That, and I don't want anything to detract from JCR's white leather tux.

Jimbromski said...

SZ asked for something nice, for the ladies. This will have to do for now.

Super Zoe said...

That toast was super-romantic. Totally "the best toast ever." Maybe we can get that roadie to come to our wedding.

jcr said...

Maybe we can get Crue to play at our wedding. That way he'll have to be there.

Super Zoe said...

I am actually developing a bit of a soft spot for "the Crue"...I mean, a week ago I thought it was spelled Motley Cru, and I wasn't even sure who was in the band...now, I know their names, their struggles, their drug-induced highs and suicidal lows...
I even thought that wedding was sweet and romantic (even without the bride in a bikini.)

It's like a sickness.

Jimbromski said...

If we could just reach one person with these excerpts from The Dirt--just one solitary person--then we would consider the whole exercise a success.

Mission accomplished. Say no to drugging and drinking and say yes to Motley Crue.